d by dy

Overhearing Ally talking on her phone upset me. She came back while I was watching an anime. I always knew she was going to get a good job. Not being able to congratulate her or celebrate when it happens makes me sick. Me, a stranger.

I can hear the closing song: “Rain tumbles down. The bus is late. Suddenly a furry, wet giant is by your side. Don’t be afraid. Just open wide your umbrella for him. Watch him play in the rain. Now begins a new adventure for you.”

When the relevant adventure began, I often sat in Langdell for half an hour and fail to remember any word I read. If I held open a book now, the same thing would happen—but for different, bad reasons.

I want a hug.

Away from where you sit and away from the complexities of human life was a village whose citizens consist of mathematical functions.

For example, commoners included the empathetic X. Lady Sine of X was known for her mood swings. Lord E-to-the-X was a loner that could only integrate with himself.

Citizens lived in predictable lives until the misfortunes of Lord E-to-the-X began with the arrival of an enigmatic traveler.

The traveler brought with him a mystical sword of immense power. A cursed sword. Indeed, the curse is such that it may be wielded by only the most worthy, the Dragon Warrior, the one who could survive the test of differentiation.

The villagers were not eager to be tested.

“I like being able to relate to people,” said X to Lady Sine of X.

“I’d rather be an emotionless Constant than join the family of those dreadful Cosines,” replied the Lady.

Only Lord E-to-the-X remained undaunted: “I am myself no matter how many times the differentiation.” He accepted the test, and vanished into a ring of smoke as soon as he touched the sword.

The sword’s name was d by dy.